The Marriage Contract Essay Example

The Marriage Contract Essay Example The Marriage Contract Essay The Marriage Contract Essay A wedding is something that most little girl’s dream of having one day. The perfect dress, the perfect flowers, and the perfect man is what they see their wedding day consisting of. The wedding is the beginning of marriage, and there are certain things that I would like from my dream man so that we can have a â€Å"perfect† marriage. A marriage, to me, is a relationship between two equal beings who want to spend their rest of their lives together. I believe that both of us should be treated equal in the relationship, and the power is split between us. . I believe it is important to have a marriage contract between my future husband and I because I would like to see if we believe in the same things. Do we see eye to eye or close to on how we want the household run or do we want children? As we get older, we’ll probably need to redo the contract to fit our changing lifestyle. We’ll probably need one for how we want to raise our children and how the household duties will be run when we have children running around. Another time we may need to revise it is if we get to busy for each other. I would like to still have a marriage when I have children. I see how some people forget about their spouses because they get so involved with work and children. There may be other times when we need to revise this marriage contract because our lives may change with children, a possible loss of a job, or anything that’s life altering which will cause a need to fix it. At this point in my life my marriage contract will state that I would like for us both to have solid jobs. I think it’s important to both have jobs so that neither of us is supporting each other. It’s possible when we have children this feeling may alter to work best for our lifestyle. For the time being though, I don’t want to be taking care of my husband, nor do I want him to take care of me. Since I would like to be a teacher, I shouldn’t have too many issues with my job being too demanding. If his job is more demanding than I’ like, I would want him to make up for it on his days off. If he had to travel a whole bunch I don’t know if I could continue the marriage, unless it was only for a short period of time. So that would have to be discussed if it ever came about. If his job caused him to move, I would agree to move with him after my school year was done. I on’t have a problem with moving around a lot if his job is pays well, because I would be willing to volunteer around the community rather than working a full time job. I want to be a part of something outside my marriage whether it’s job or volunteering. When it comes to friends, I think it’s very important to have friends who are couples. I grew up where my parents would always hang out with other couples and it really worked out nicely for them. They would go on two or three vacations a year with each other and if both of their families couldn’t make it for holidays we would all spend it together. I would want that for my marriage, so that I don’t feel like we can’t go out together with groups. I would also like to have to opportunity to have our friends over to our place. If we decide to go out separately, as a girls or guys night out, I would expect a text here and there about what’s going on and who they’re with. It would also depend on where the trust level is in the relationship, because that may change how one of us feels about the other going out. Another problem, if there is trust issues, is if we have friends of the opposite sex. I tend to have friends that are guys, so I would have to be okay with him having girls for friends. However, our best opposite sex friend should be each other. I once had a counselor who told my boyfriend and I that it’s okay to have friends of the opposite sex but they can never be your best friend because it never works out unless you marry your best friend. All in all, I want us to have friends outside of each other, because I feel that is a very important factor in maintain a healthy relationship. Religion is a huge part of my life, and I would like for my husband to be on the same page as me. I have no religion except for the belief in Agnosticism, but I love visiting new churches and speaking with members so I can understand more. One day, I would like to settle on some belief, possibly when children come into the picture, but I want to have similar beliefs. I was raised Christian, so I would like to think that one day I’ll go back to that train of thought, so I would like him to possibly know Christianity. I want us both to be open minded when it comes to religion, and I do not want a man who pushes his religion on me. When we have down time, such as the weekend, I would like us to have some things we do together and some we do separate. I think it’s important to have our own identity where we have different interest, but I also think it’s important to have things we enjoy doing together. As for vacations, I don’t believe they should be taken without each other, unless it’s to see our family. I believe vacations are meant for single people or families, and if you looking to enjoy yourself, you can do so with your spouse. If both of us are working, I think we should have separate accounts and one shared account. Every pay check we put a set amount in our own account that we get to spend on whatever we’d like. Then we put the rest of our pay check into a shared account and with that money we pay our bills. Any extra money in that account is only usable if we both agree on what it’s being spent on. With this set up we have our own money and we both contribute to paying for our expenses. No one can get mad about unnecessary spending, such as video games or brunch with the girls. As for credit cards, we have separate ones that we pay for out of our own account. If one of us needs to borrow money I’d be more than willing to help them, unless they were out of control with their own spending. I don’t want to deal with someone who isn’t finically stable or at least knows how to control their spending. Household chores aren’t very important to me. I don’t mind cleaning and I don’t mind picking up after someone else. The only time it would play a major role is when I cleaning for something or someone and I want to clean very well. I would expect help around the house if someone was coming to visit or if we were having a party, but even then I wouldn’t care if I did most of the work. I’m not concerned when it comes to household responsibilities, so I’d be willing to take that responsibility on. I want to find someone who wants to start having kids before the age of thirty-five. I don’t really have a preference at this point in time on how many kids I want, but I would like to find someone open-minded and not set on what they want. As long as my partner is willing to negotiate about how many children we want and when they want them I will be willing to find a medium with him. When raising our children I would like to maintain a more authoritative parenting style. I would like my husband to have the same style or close to. I do not want a man who cannot connect with his children, and I also do not want a man who wants to be his child’s friend. I feel like there needs to be a middle ground. I also don’t want my kids to think I’m the push over or think I’m the bad cop compared to their dad. I want them to see us as an equal parent because I think it’s important to raise a strong family. I love moving and traveling so I wouldn’t mind moving around a whole bunch the only objection I would have is I couldn’t live in a small town. A small suburb would be fine, but no country towns. If we didn’t move a lot I would want a house or a large apartment. I want animals so a place for them to run around is important to me. Ideally I would like to live somewhere in Europe or Canada, but if that’s not an option living anywhere cold is what I want the most. I also don’t want to find ourselves ever moving in with other family members, because I feel like you need to make it on your own. I’m not too particular on the living arrangements as long as we can agree that living in the heat is not an option unless we move a lot. My husband is my husband and I am his wife. We do not share each other with other people and I have no desire to explore other options. So if that’s what he wants than I would have to end things. I think also if that it’s something he believes in but would be willing to change I would still end things because it shows he doesn’t respect the monogamy of marriage and would easily slip up. Anything outside of monogamy is just not an option for me. If an abortion was necessary or unnecessary I would want my husband to be okay with it like I am. If he did what I wanted I would feel fully responsible for taking a child’s life. If he was against it I would feel pressured to give birth to a child I wasn’t ready for. There are just too many different situations that could occur that I would want my husband to feel open to the idea of abortion if it was needed. I could never be with someone who didn’t want pets or at least allow me to have pets. I don’t want a zoo but I don’t want to feel like I can’t own a pet if I want one. I have a dog currently who is an inside dog and if my husband wasn’t okay with that, I wouldn’t be okay with him. Animals are a huge part of my life and I wouldn’t be with someone without them. When it comes to in-laws, I don’t want to live with them and I don’t want them to live with me. I feel like it causes too much stress on the relationship which will lead to problems in the relationship. I also don’t think it’s healthy for the relationship between parent and child. So unless it’s necessary that they move in then it’s not an option for me. If I was put on life support I would want to be let go because of the financial struggle to will cause my husband and the pain it will cause us both to suffer. If he was put on life support I would ask what he wants before it happens and try to follow his wishes. I can’t say I’ll be strong enough to let him go because I’ve never been through it, but I would hope I can be strong enough for him. On thing that is very important to me is traveling. Traveling is something I’ve always wanted to do and I want to find someone with that same passion. If they had no interest in it or didn’t have to the funds I don’t know if I could make things work because I think it’s import to find someone who shares your dreams. If they don’t share dreams with you, you may grow to resent them. I want to enjoy my life traveling and exploring with my husband so we can grown together. These are most if not all the things I would like to be present in my marriage, and I hope to find someone who is on the same page as me. If they don’t agree on most if not all I’ll have to make the decision between changing my views or possibly finding someone else who meets more to my needs. Finding someone you care about and someone who agrees on your points of view is important to marriage.